Ace Goes to Hollywood: A Podcast for Your Eyes
by Jack Pendarvis
Episode 1: The Good News and the Bad News
JACK PENDARVIS: All right, let’s record. Hello! This is Jack Pendarvis. I’m in my driveway in Oxford, Mississippi. Uh, Ace is sitting there in his truck—my friend Ace Atkins. Wait a minute! Here’s the neighborhood pit bull, Maggie. Hello, Maggie! Yes, dogs just run around in Oxford, Mississippi. Sorry, I can’t… we’re on the road, Maggie. Don’t run over Maggie.
ACE ATKINS: I see Maggie.
JACK: Watch out, Maggie. Go on, now.
ACE: Honestly, there was a second I thought you had turned into a dog, like the Shaggy D.A, because the dog was waiting at the top of the hill.
JACK: Well, you’re already talking about movies, which is what I want to… first of all, I don’t think I even got to introduce the project. This is Ace Goes to Hollywood: A Podcast for Your Eyes. I call it that because people are going to read it. They’re not going to listen to it like lazy jerks.
ACE: Well, then, they can bring their own imagination.
JACK: That’s right! Well, they could do that with a real podcast, too.
ACE: They can imagine our voices.
JACK: Okay. Oh! I should say we’re in Oxford, Mississippi, and we’re driving to Memphis, Tennessee. Ace is driving. I’m riding along. I’m going to interview him about something that’s—I’ve wanted to talk to him about this for years. Uhm…
ACE: It has been years.
JACK: Now, Ace has written how many books? Thirty-one?
ACE: Thirty-one books.
JACK: Before that, he was a journalist.
ACE: That’s right. In quotes.
JACK: No, you were a real journalist! We won’t be having any of that…
ACE: All right, all right.
JACK: False modesty. People don’t like that. Uh… but… what we’re going to be talking about, I don’t know. Should I give a spoiler? Because nobody’s going to care. When I say what it is, everybody’s going to immediately stop reading.
ACE: Or you’re going to find that one percent of people in overseas markets are going to be seizing on it, because I understand the movie is a classic in… it was huge in Japan.
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