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Twenty-One Reactions to Seeing Those Assholes Eating McDonald’s on a Private Jet

by Miles Klee

Close-up of a McDonald's Big Mac showing layers of seeded bun, pickle, hamburger patty, lettuce, sauce, more bread, a corner of lurid American cheese sticking out like a grotesque tongue, second hamburger patty, lettuce, bottom bun
CC0 via Wikimedia Commons

“Johnson confirms that RFK Jr. ‘did actually eat some of the McDonald’s.’”
—Katherine Swartz, reporter for NOTUS

Re: this photograph:

  1. They should not even have access to fast food. That is ours.

  1. Why is Don Jr. holding up the carton of McDonald’s fries for the camera? We can easily see what they are. Fucking idiot. 

  1. What the fuck is the silverware for? You are eating chicken nuggets.

  1. Chicken nuggets are great, but a disastrous prop for a bunch of sweaty goons who would have us believe they can be trusted with the nuclear codes. We cannot allow chicken nuggets into the White House; these chuds should be surviving on cottage cheese and pineapple, like Richard Nixon. We used to be a proper country…   

  1. Trump Sr.’s row of bespoke condiments includes a shaker of salt. This man is salting his fast food. We need immediate disclosures about what kind of medical technology is being used to keep him alive. 

  1. (Seeing that Filet-O-Fish) I know it smell crazy in there.

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